Tag Archive | Penis

Body Changes

501 2017-06-15 93 02 Physical Changes Body Changes (1)


After a brief interruption with post number 500, now I can resume in telling you about the possibilities I see to have a part time life as a woman, while my brother can retain part of his man’s life for the rest of the time.

So; for what I understand, if testicles are removed, since there is no more Testosterone production, Testosterone injections have to be used to compensate for what the body needs for a normal functioning. In the case of Transsexual Women, instead of using Testosterone injections the doctors would use Estrogen injections, so to make the body work as a female body, which in turns create changes like redistributing the body fat in a more female proportion, reducing the amount of fat at the waist and giving more to the hips, together with creating small breasts, sometimes even with functioning nipples!

Also, it suppose to be changes like reduction in body and face hair, sometimes augmenting head hair, softening of the skin, and several more things, including nasty mood changes and possible depression and even suicide thoughts (ouch!).

Risky, I know; but since nothing is decided yet, it is still the time to analyze pros and cons of every possibility available. As I mentioned before, since my brother can live his life with his body never being seen again by his wife, it is possible to consider the possibility of transforming the body to a certain point where he can use it as a male body most of the times, and me as a female body the rest of the time.

Most probably he would have to “compress” his small breasts with a cloth band to hide them under his T shirt, while keeping his male ways and voice; and I would have to “enhance” the lack of shape with appropriate female clothes and movements, together with developing a female voice and manners. None of us would be 100 percent man or woman, but he should pass good enough as a man while I should pass OK as a woman; although, I hope I could pass OK as a woman when naked, but he will definitely not!

With the voice, for what I understand, using Estrogen instead of Testosterone would not promote any changes in the sound of the voice when going from male to female. I believe when going from female to male there are some changes in voice, becoming deeper than before. But from male to female there are no changes in that matter, so the only way to go there is to work on voice training to attain a more female-like voice.

There are many videos in YouTube and programs for sale that can be used for that purpose (I have a couple of paid programs and several videos saved), but obviously it takes lots of practice and dedication to achieve a decent result; something in the couple of years work (sigh!)

So the plan would be to extirpate the testicles and penis, and start taking Estrogen shots every month…for life! That should help in developing a more female-like figure, which would combine with the unchangeable elements (like bone structure, harder face, etc) to create a kind of Androgynous body that should be possible to dress as a man or a woman as needed. You can see in the picture below, it’ll make very little difference between having the penis and testicles and having none! (sorry bro! :(  ). But to me it’ll make a world of difference!


501 2017-06-15 93 02 Physical Changes Body Changes (2)


As a man; short hair, compressed breasts, loose man’s T shirt, jeans and tennis shoes, together with a male voice and manners.

As a woman; long hair (wig), small breasts, sexy shirt, mini skirt and tennis shoes, together with a sort of soft female voice and manners.

It will be a lot of work, but I am so excited about the possibility!

But of course there are big problems. Not just the “eternal” voice and manners training, which includes, voice, face and eyes expressions, gesticulation, seating, walking, and so on, but the problem of age!

You see, my brother is 55 right now. If the whole process takes 5 years, he will be 60 by the time we can use the body by turns; which means I will be an older woman! There is nothing wrong with a woman being in her 60’s, but since I didn’t have the chance to experience physical life from the beginning, I dream of being a sexy woman that can be considered beautiful, sexy and very attractive. So it is a very late start in life!

I can still “salvage” some of the “sweet years” a girl and a woman have from like 15 to 45, but it won’t be much, and I still would look old. And even worst, salvage something but not for a long time anyway. By starting at 60 years old, if we (my brother and I) can keep a very healthy lifestyle, so to keep the body at its best, still the limit to enjoy a more “physical” life would be until around 70, so just 10 years! If you are over 50 you know 10 years go flying! Only when you are 5, 10 years are an eternity.

So to enjoy the female pleasures of feeling attractive and sexually active I will have 10 years at the most! Then it could be a nice lady that can still travel, but getting involved in mostly “talking” relationships, as most people in their 70’s usually don’t have very good sexually working bodies. And unfortunately a lady in her 70’s wearing a mini skirt is usually considered ridiculous rather than sexy! Oh well!!

So that’s the plan. At least my plan. My brother is still thinking the possibilities and problems involved that should be considered. In any case, I’m still shaving the body and enjoying my small breasts while naked when being alone. :)

Now, there has been some situations that might help my “cause” in the short term, but I’ll tell you about that in the next post. In the meantime, have a wonderful week, and thank you for visiting my site!

Sweet kisses




499 2017-06-01 92 02 Physical Changes Possibilities (1)


So yes, I did shave the legs, LOL. Just take a look at the picture above to see the mess I created! I guess I was too much in a hurry to see results and didn’t take the time to do things carefully. At least the rash and skin damage were only at the most upper part of the legs, so it is just a small portion…nothing a couple of days applying Aloe Gel can’t fix.

And so now it is just the arms that aren’t shaved, which I cannot do because it’ll be too obvious; being summer time (almost) my brother wears T shirts with short sleeves, so the arms would accuse something strange going on. The rest of the body should be OK since my brother always use something in the upper part (never without a shirt), and never wears shorts, so all the so far shaved areas will be always covered with clothes; my brother never even go barefoot! It is me the one who loves to be naked every time I can! LOL

Now, in the previous post I mentioned I was planning something to “force” my time living in physical life. What happens is that, if I cannot take the body completely to be a woman full time and “out of the closet”, meaning by that with legal sex and name change, then the next best thing should be to live as a woman part time, while my brother remains in physical life continuing his own life. In other words, he would remain as a man legally, yet physically his body could be “adapted” to be used sporadically as a woman.

You see, as I already mentioned, my brother and his wife are basically roommates sleeping in different bedrooms. They never see each other naked again and for the past 15 years, which is what allows me to shave the body to have it hairless for when I can use it. And if they never see each other naked again, she never sees his genitals either, which means they can be removed!

I know it may sound a little extreme, but my brother would gladly let me have the body to transform it into a female body, except that he knows that would mean loosing his family. He and his wife may not be a couple anymore, but my brother still have feelings for his family and doesn’t want to loose them, so it is not so simple as to tell them he is “switching sides”. They would never understand and/or accept. I know she would not.

So why not to use the situation as it is and, considering she never see him naked, just do half surgeries and remove the penis and testicles, but without creating a vagina, and definitely without changing name and sex legally. In the outside my brother would continue living as a man and looking “mostly” as a man, while under his clothes it’ll be a body with a shape mostly female, except for the absence of a vagina. The shape between the legs would be generally female; and with the aid (and need from then on) of female hormones to compensate for the absence of the testicles (no Testosterone generation anymore) small breasts should develop. It wouldn’t be a perfect female shape, especially for the still male proportion between shoulders and hips, but at least it should be close enough to be a woman physically, even if not the most attractive, as you can see in the picture below, which I touched up to make disappear the penis and testicles and reduced the waist as to visualize the body after loosing the extra weight, together with adding a wig to obtain the general look.


499 2017-06-01 92 02 Physical Changes Possibilities (2)


Not the best looking woman, I know, but I think it should “pass” good enough to be seen as a woman rather than a man.

There are many other little details to worry about related to how my brother can still have his man’s life with a semi-female body under the clothes, together with many other little details to worry about related to how I can have a woman’s life with an incomplete female body and no identity, but I’ll tell you more about those in the next post.




TS Question



Trying to understand my own feelings I came up with a question to help me see why I want to be a woman. The question is like this:


Assuming I am alone and no family to consider in my decisions.
No Family, friends and neighbors to worry about.
Just my own feelings to consider when making a decision.

If there was an injection that I can put on me only once in my life.
And this injection would cost no more than $100.
And this injection will change my body from male to female in like one year.
And it’ll transform my male parts into female parts.
From having a penis and testicles to having a vagina.

And it’ll grow nice and firm breasts with nice nipples.
And will also transform my body shape from male proportions to female proportions.
With wide hips and bigger butt.
While shrinking my shoulders and rib cage.
And will make the skin in my whole body smooth.
While getting rid of all my body hair and beard.
And growing nice long head hair.

And will soften my voice to a nice and sweet female voice.
And will stretch the skin in my face.
Giving me a beautiful, young looking face.
In other words.
It’ll change my body into a young, beautiful and sexy girl.

But the downside is that there will be no sex!
I will never feel aroused again.
And if having sex I will feel nothing!
So no masturbation, neither foreplay will arouse me ever again.
Living the rest of my life without sexual desire or pleasure from it.
With no sex with women or men.

Yet I will be a woman in my body, and a beautiful and sexy one!
So it’ll be just about dressing as a woman.
Doing my daily errands as a woman.
Living as women do.

Will I take the injection?
Will I accept living as a woman in exchange of never having sex again?





Dream Date

431   2016-04-18     48  05 Dates and Encounters                Dream Date (1)


We all dream of something we would like to experience, and I guess that shows who we are, what we want, and what are we searching for.

Since I feel as a woman, I like to be the female, kitty type one. Dressing sexy in what in my concepts is sexy, which seems to differ from what guys and CD’s in sex dating sites most commonly like.

I’ll be wearing a light fabric dress; the kind that opens in front and you put it on like a jacket. It would be a very simple design dress, that covers my butt like a mini skirt, and is closed in front with a line of buttons, and then an integrated belt. I will have nothing else on me; no shoes, no underwear, nothing. Just my wig and make up, and some light jewelry like earrings and a necklace.

My date will visit me at my place, so I’ll be waiting for him with my dress on and some wine ready to serve. When it comes to men I like the simple type, not the big muscle kind; he is in decent shape but nothing great. He is wearing jeans, a T shirt and tennis shoes when he visits me. Think of a geek type; maybe a library rat.

We get together and he holds me and kiss me while I give myself up to him. He starts unbuttoning my dress and I let him, as a sign that I am his to play with. He opens my dress and start massaging my breasts as we chat for a moment about how our days have been going. Then he walks me to my bed. I go in front of him and he lifts my dress and grabs my butt as we walk.

I pour some wine in the glasses and play some romantic music in the stereo. We drink and dance slowly while kissing. Then he takes my dress off and I am completely naked in front of him while he is still with his clothes on. I am his, for his pleasure. I kneel in front of him and make love to his cock for a while, so he can feel pleasure. Then he takes me to bed and bend me over, having my butt in front of him. He massage my whole body and kiss me all over very sweetly, as he knows that gets me wild.


431   2016-04-18     48  05 Dates and Encounters                Dream Date (2)


He kiss and licks my ass, to then play with it pouring lots of lube, and then he enters me, very slowly and carefully, while I feel him taking me and making me his. Then he grabs me from my hips and starts fucking me harder and harder, while I stand the fucking, the shaking, the use he is giving me. There’s nothing I can do, other than let him fuck me, and that gives me so much pleasure knowing he is having pleasure by using me to get his sexual relief.

Then he lift me and throw me in bed face down, so he can fuck me while being on top of me. He fucks me in my ass, at the same time he grabs me tight from my shoulders and breasts, while breathing heavily in my neck. All his weight is over me, so I feel I can’t move; I can’t do anything; I have to stand the hard fucking until he decided he had enough. He is the wolf; I am the prey and he is feasting on me!! So I close my eyes and enjoy being his for his pleasure.

When he is ready to cum, sometimes he cums inside me; other times he cums all over my back and butt, and other times he turn me around and cum in my face, my mouth or my breasts. He leaves me with his cum on me.

Then he takes me by the hand and guide me to the shower, where he starts washing me all over, while I stand still with my arms over my head and my eyes closed for him to wash his toy. His hands run all over my body, invading every very personal place. But I let him because I know he enjoys having me all, and I enjoy being his all.

He soaps my body with his hands, and then wash away the soap, again, with his hands. I am touched everywhere several times. I am groped and used by him, while I stand still with my arms on my head, and remain with my eyes closed, so he doesn’t feel controlled on what he can and cannot do because of my eyes. He owns me and he knows it.


431   2016-04-18     48  05 Dates and Encounters                Dream Date (3)


Then he drys my body with the towel, and takes me by the hand to the living room, to have another glass of wine, listen to the soft music, and seat in the couch with me leaning my head in his shoulder or over his legs. I talk very softly and slightly touch his body, so he knows I am his kitty to pet for a moment.

Times always fly when having fun, and when six hours had gone in like five minutes, he has to leave. So I go with him to the front door hugging him and softly rubbing my face in his neck while purring like a kitten. Then at the door, he is standing ready to go while I am standing still naked, saying goodbye. We kiss, he gropes me again and give me a quick spank, and then he leaves.

He is happy because he had me. He loves me because I give him pleasure the way he wants it, and I love him because he is very sweet and tender with me, and he treats me like a fragile kitten that needs love. We give each other what the other wants sexually, and in the way each other want it. So even though I reduce myself to serve him and give him pleasure, and he takes me and uses me for his pleasure, we both do it with respect, care and love, so we know we are for each other.

Then the times we have outside of the bedroom talking and discussing things…that’s a completely different story! But I’ll tell you about that in another post.




Forbidden Pleasures

411   2016-01-16    46  05 Dates and Encounters                Forbidden Pleasures (1)


I’ve mentioned before I don’t like my genitals to be touched when sex playing. There are two reasons for that; one, they are the wrong part in me, so when a man play with them I feel he is not interested in the woman I am, but rather the body of a man, and so he sees a man in me; and two, my genitals are very fragile and prone to pain, so they have to be handle very carefully, or I will get lots of pain!!

So I don’t use my genitals!! Instead, I can use the rest of the body as my sexual part. Still, my friend likes to play with my cock, and he is so gentle when doing it, that he is the only one I would allow to touch them. I know when he is playing with my genitals, not only I don’t get pain, but instead I do get lots of pleasure, as you can imagine while looking at the picture above.

Actually, this picture is one of the very rare occasion when he played with my cock since it really doesn’t happens very often. I don’t like my genitals to be touched and so he stays away from them, until for some strange and obscure reason, he does play with my parts again. But that is a pleasure that, even it can be very nice to feel, I prefer to skip when we are making love.

At the other hand, I guess I should be thankful he kept my cock “out of the picture” by keeping it in his mouth!! LOL