Archive | June 2014

Butt Marks

211   2014-06-30    21   07 All Others                                    Butt Marks (1)


When I’m in my place, I like to be naked since I’m alone. Usually there are many things to do, and one of the things I do is to seat in front of the computer and write posts, surf the net, check the sites I have a profile in, in case I got some mail, etc

By now I have a nice desk with a nice, vinyl computer chair; but before I only had a metallic patio chair without the cushion. It is nice to seat in there even without the cushion, but when naked, the metal grid where you seat have a nasty tendency to get imprinted in your butt, as you can see in the pictures.


211   2014-06-30    21   07 All Others                                    Butt Marks (2)


When this happened to me, I became tired of seating, so stood up and passed my hands in my butt to stimulate blood circulation and discovered the marks in my butt. Immediately I grabbed the camera and took these pictures to show you how funny my butt looked!

But even though it looks funny, I also found the texture was kind of interesting to feel in my hands, and I wished I had a lover at that moment so he could enjoy grabbing the strange skin of his alien girlfriend, LOL




Stop Dating

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About a week ago I decided not to date again until I really improve my look!

What happens is that at this point in my life I am sort of “in between”, which means I have too many activities that prevent me from improving my look and female ways, so dating not only takes even more of the scarce time I have, but also I am getting with a man not being all the woman I suppose to be for him. In other words, I feel like I’m cheating on them by showing pictures that present a better looking woman that I really am! And when it comes to conversation, my voice and manners are not what would be expected by looking at the pictures I publish.

So far when dating, guys have told me that I do look and act as a woman, but maybe my own expectations are bigger than normal, so I feel like they are just being nice, but I am not there yet.

For these reasons I decide to stop dating and use that time to improve myself, so next time I date someone, I would really look and feel like a woman for my man, and he could be seen with me in public and he would feel good about the company he is having.

These improvements imply a lot of work in several different areas, so I believe it’ll take me about a year to complete. The areas that I want to improve are:


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1-Loosing weight

I’m really overweight at this point! According to the tables in my country (which are a lot more strict that here in the US) I am around 30 lbs too many! Here I would be about 20 lbs above, but I still prefer to go for more, so to be in the skinny side rather than the “generous” one. I really hate the classification of “A few extra pounds”, LOL

2-Reshaping the body

Even if I was 30 lbs less than now, still my body would have the shape of a man’s body, so I have to do something to change the shape into a more female form, which includes finding a way to make my butt and boobs bigger, while reducing the waist area the most I can. That should show a female body rather than a male one, but I fear I would have to go into hormones!

3-Learning to walk

Sometimes it is such a complicated thing to forget what I learned and practiced for so many years, that it requires dedication and time to learn to walk like a woman, rather than a man. Keeping the upper half of the body straight and still, while all the walking movements are done just with the hips and legs is not easy for a man!


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4-Learning to gesticulate

Another element where men and women have so many differences; and if I want to be a woman, I have to learn all those little details that make the big difference! Men do not gesticulate much when talking, while women sort of reinforce their words with their hands.

5-Learning to talk

Seems so obvious, but there are so many differences in the way men and women talk; the words they use are different, and the tone and flow in a woman’s talk is softer and like singing, so I need to practice more to catch and retain the differences.

6-Develop female voice

It seems is mostly about learning to talk without using the Adam’s apple, so the voice would be softer, but it does take a lot of time to learn to control the vocal cords to obtain the desired effect.

7-Better wardrobe

Clothes should be according to the personality, and matching all the pieces together, so there are many things to learn in this area too. And it also takes time to buy all the clothes to complete a wardrobe, which means money, so it has to be done little by little, spending some more every month.


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8-Practice with toys

Not just to have fun by myself with toys, but mostly to train my hole to receive a man’s cock quickly and with very little preparation (and patience) from my date. The idea is to create flexibility in my hole, so with little preparation I can have it open enough to receive a cock, and this anytime I date someone; after all a man wants to fuck, and I want to be fucked by a man! If I offer to be a lover on the side for a married man, without any other obligation from his part, that means we get together so he can fuck me, and that also means I have to be ready for him as quickly as I can!



So you see, there are eight areas to work in, and all of them take time to really develop them properly. It is not just about putting on women clothes and move the hips a lot when walking, it is a complete change in the ways to enter a different world…the female world!

So I estimate it’ll take me a whole year to reach my goal of advancing each one of the areas I mentioned, to a point where I can feel more confident in my look and ways. I really don’t know if I’ll be able to hold myself and not to take an opportunity to date someone since there are so many hot men out there! LOL But if I slip and accept dates, I hope I’ll keep it to the minimum.

In future posts I’ll tell you how I am working in each area, the progress, and the “tricks” I’m using, and if you have any suggestion, advice and/or trick to share, I’m all ears!




New Site

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A couple of days ago I joined (sort of by accident) another site for dating. It is called, and it seems a site mostly for Straight people, so I guess I shouldn’t be there, but still opened a profile and posted some pictures.

Immediately got many responses from guys living close to me who wanted to meet, which was very surprising and enticing at the same time. Then I realized my profile said “Woman” since it seems not to have the possibility of Transsexual (as I selected when opening the profile), so immediately wrote a longer description clarifying that I was a Transsexual (woman in a male body) and not a Woman (woman in a female body).

Then I answered the many letters I received and also clarified the mistake there, and gave the choice to the guys of going ahead with a date or simply stopping everything and call it just a misunderstanding with no hard feelings. From about 15 initial letters I received in two days, only one guy responded to thank me for my honesty…and then disappear like the others, LOL

I’m not surprised since I know for a straight man just the thought of getting intimate with another man, even if this other man is a woman in a man’s body, will give them Goosebumps! And I know there are some for whom a male in women’s clothes will always be a Faggot and nothing else, with complete disregard of the feelings.

With this, I realized this site will be the same like the others…completely unproductive!


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Still, I made sure my profile description clarified that I am a woman in a male body, and that I was in search mostly of a married man without sex at home, that would be willing to accept that I am a woman with male genitals, in exchange of getting not only some sex, but a more caring and sweeter woman than many females; and that also would cost him nothing, not in money, attentions and/or gifts, but also in problems or conditions. Just fun sex on the side for his needs of the sweetness and sex he wasn’t getting at home.

Also, I posted 5 pictures (the maximum allowed) so to give them an idea of how I look dressed and naked, and I noted in my profile description that I would be changing the pictures a couple of times a week for them to see more of me.

I did all of that, mostly as a personal challenge of having a more complete profile, but knowing that nothing would happen in the future, mostly because they are looking for a female and not a Transsexual.

Still, as a proper woman, I decided to check the “competition” and did a search as a Man searching for a Woman between 45 and 55 years old. I wanted to see what is what the guys find, together with my profile, when they are searching for women to date.


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To my surprise, just with the exception of one or two, all the other women were sort of fat and not so good looking, those who dared to post a picture, which is about 10 percent of the profiles, while the other 90 percent just didn’t have a picture at all! And what surprised me the most what the number of conditions they set! The guy should be a gentleman and take them out dinner, dancing, movies, etc. and also be kind and sweet in bed.

They didn’t fill out anything else in their profile, so all that could be read was their conditions, and all that could be seen was a picture of a woman not so good looking in not so nice clothes; or simply no picture at all. It wasn’t a surprise for me that most of the profile seemed to be inactive for more than six months! Nobody answered!!

At the other hand, without being a good looking woman, my profile showed me naked in erotic poses, while describing many things about me, and clarifying I wanted to give pleasure to a man and asked nothing in return; all in exchange they “oversee” my male genitals and take me as a woman, based on my inner feelings, my ways and my general look. It seems like a good deal to me, but I prefer to think that nothing will happen anyway, just in case.


209   2014-06-25    26   05 Dates and Encounters                New Site (4)


Still, I did get a date with a man from that site, who said he responded to my profile because he was what I was looking for: A married man without sex at home. He is the one I met on PrideFest, as I mentioned in the previous post.

Today I received mail from him telling me we should meet again to see if things go better, which gave me the idea he wasn’t much impressed. I answered that yes, we should, in better conditions, like while having a bed available. He wrote again to tell me he was free the next morning, which is too fast for me since I need time to do a complete body shave and make up and so on, so told him I was busy this week, apologized, and asked him for next week. He answered with a letter with like four words that I couldn’t understand the meaning, but I assume he said yes, but didn’t like the idea.

Oh well! That’s fine. We’ll see if he writes to me again. In the meantime I have a ton of things to do, so don’t worry much about it, and my profile is still ON in that new site, so who knows…




Pride Day 2

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After parking his car we walked back to the PrideFest and seated in a bench about a block away from the festivities. We talked some more and let the clock keep going while I didn’t want to press for a hug or a kiss. Then we walked to my vehicle and decide to go some other park, so I gave him a ride to his car, and then followed him.

The first park was really crowded and there was no place to park, so we kept driving to another that was almost empty. We walked for a little and seated to talk some more, until the cold afternoon breeze pushed us out to seat in my vehicle. By then more than 3 hours have gone by and still no kisses or hugs, but as I mentioned, I didn’t want to press because I met him in a site for Straight people, so I knew he was in search of a female, not a Transsexual, and I know for a Straight man the sole idea of kissing or hugging a Transsexual makes them very uncomfortable; for many those who dress in women clothes are just faggots!


208   2014-06-24    42   04 Trips and Adventures                 Pride Day 2 (2)


After almost four hours he leaned over me and gave me a kiss, so we started to hug, kiss and touch each other’s body. He searched for my open blouse to reach my breasts, and I reached for his pants to find his cock. After a while I was leaning to his side and sucking his cock, while he was slowly dragging a hand in my back, under my blouse. I told him it was fine if he wanted to cum in my mouth, and he said yes, but he was too nervous with other cars in the area, so he didn’t; which was very unfortunate because I would love that he could have some sexual relief.

Such an uncomfortable thing to make up in a car! I really don’t know how young people can do it all the time, and even get pregnant!! LOL

After about an hour we stopped since it was becoming too late for both of us, so fixed our clothes the best we could and seated back, straight in our seats in my car. I asked him if he liked it and he answered “It was interesting”, which gave me the feelings that he didn’t enjoy it that much. Then he left my vehicle to board his car. We drove away in different directions, and now I am waiting for an email from him, telling me if the experience was satisfactory for him, and if he would like to meet again.


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As I mentioned above, I met him in a site mostly for Straight people. He, like the other men there, are looking for females to have sex with, not Transsexual. I seem to be one of the very, very few Transsexuals in the site; and he decided to “give me a try” mostly because he is having no sex at all at home for more than a year! I guess it was mostly desperation than attraction what moved him to ask me for a date!

So I didn’t want to press for kisses or hugs, until he felt comfortable doing that and decide to make the first move. Still, it went great considering that situation, and now I hope he would like to meet again. We’ll see what happens; and I’ll tell you if it did in future posts.




Pride Day 1

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So the PrideFest came and went! And it tasted like so little and foreign

On Saturday I had like one hour before work, so quickly drove there and took a brisk walk around to see what this was all about, and check out if I would be too out of place dressing as a woman (I was dressing as a man at that moment).

I wanted to see if it’ll be too notorious a man in women’s clothes, or if I could easily blend in the crowd. Too my surprise, I only saw two men in women’s clothes, and they looked more like clowns than normal women! The rest were mostly Lesbians holding hands; gay guys holding hands, and lots and lots of young (and gorgeous) girls dressing like Exotic Dancer half way through their show!

At one hand I could see no real reference on how I would compare to other Transsexuals in women’s clothes, and at the other I felt completely out of place while being among so many strangely dressed people! I don’t want to dress like for a show, I want to dress and look like a real, common, sexy woman!

So that short hour gave me a good idea of what this PrideFest was all about: For some the opportunity to be themselves in public without being bothered, and for others the chance to dress crazy, with painted faces and all, and also, not being questioned. I didn’t fit very well there!


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With that, I went to work knowing the next day it wouldn’t be a priority to come back and walk at the “Big Show”.

It was good though that I did that short walk, because the next day I was late to get there, and reached the meeting point with my date just 30 minutes before, so really didn’t have much time to walk around and take pictures. So I just stood at the meeting point looking around and thinking about the expectation for a whole year, just to feel out of place anyway, and a strange creature once more. In short, the PrideFest might have been a great time for many, but a waste of time for me! I guess if I was more comfortable with my female side in public, I would be less inhibited and be able to enjoy more the festivities. Maybe next year!

So having a date at the same moment could save the day!

I was standing at the intersection, leaning in a street pole checking the messages in my cell phone, when I heard someone calling “Angel”. I lifted my head and searched for the one calling, and saw a passing vehicle and an arm waving. I realized it was him, and he was just doing a gesture that he would come back, probably after finding a parking spot.


207   2014-06-23    41   04 Trips and Adventures                 Pride Day 1 (3)


So I crossed the street and waited for him, still playing with my cell phone, when I heard a voice to my side. He was standing there, with a smile, and looking a bit nervous! We chatted for a moment, and then went to get his vehicle from the not-so-legal parking spot he found, to move it to a safer place.

I had a hard time understanding what he was saying since he spoke in a very low voice and very fast, while my long hair covering my ears prevented me from hearing completely, plus my poor understanding of street English, since it is my second language.

So not to make this post too long, like a presidential speech, and get you all asleep, I’ll tell you the rest of the story tomorrow.